This is a post that I had posted on Sunday night, but took temporarily down until we had confirmation.
Day 13: I am thankful that God's mercies are new every morning. I am thankful that when I ask for forgiveness for my sins, his word says he remembers them no more and they are as far as the east is from the west. THANK goodness! I don't believe there is anything any more comforting than to know that God loves us despite how messed up we are or how much we have messed up. I admit that some days I struggle with remembering just how expansive his forgiveness is----especially since I'm trying to be a reformed perfectionist!!! I'm just grateful that he sees my heart and ALL of me and loves me anyway! What an amazing thing that is!
Day 14: I am thankful that God is the "great physician" and that he can bring about healing---physical, emotional, spiritual and even of the "heart".
When I chose that as my topic of thankfulness for the day this morning, I had know idea just how important that was going to be. I was thinking about it because my plate has been pretty full with so many things going on and people needing healing and I was comforted by knowing that no matter how overwhelmed I may get, HE is the great physician and HE can heal EVERY emotional wound and EVERY physical need. Specifically, I was thinking of how amazing it was going to be on the day that he brings physical healing to my brother. I was thinking about how heavy my heart has been on some issues and that he has carried me and allowed healing to take place in areas that I know I couldn't do on my own. I was thinking about the miracles he had already performed in recent weeks in the lives of so many people around me. I was also thinking about just how many people in my life that need physical healing RIGHT now. It IS overwhelming. However, I know that HE has EACH and EVERY one of us in the palm of his hand and we can find absolute comfort in that.
At that time, I didn't know that at 7:36 PM that the rug would be pulled out from under me AGAIN. I heard from my step mom that my dad had been admitted to the hospital with some VERY serious issues. At the moment, I think I'm still in shock and trying to process the information. I'm HORRIBLE at waiting. I'm a concrete kind of girl....I need FACTS and then I research like crazy and get my "solid" footing. Since this is going to require some waiting, I may go insane. My flesh side wants to just BREAK---some days I don't understand why on earth God keeps handing me more. I REALLY am not that strong!!!! However, what I believed with my whole heart this morning, I CHOOSE to believe now. HE IS the GREAT physician and he is not going to leave any of us. He has my Dad in his hands and he has each of us as well. We will pray that he performs miracles and most importantly that he brings about immediate pain relief tonight. He will be with each of us as we wait and wonder what all of "this" means. He can help me control my thoughts and keep my eyes focused on him when all I want to do is HIDE! Hopefully, we will be rejoicing in a few days when the doctors tell us that all is well and Daddy is back to being his normal self. He'll be back out in his garage working on one of his treasured classic cars, riding around the farm on his tractor, or hitting the hills on his four wheeler. In the mean time, I'm going to be flooding heaven with prayers of healing, comfort and strength.
I'm thankful that my "thankfulness" of the day was on my heart THIS morning so that my heart was better prepared to handle the phone call tonight. Having been so deep in thought about it all day was NO accident. The Holy Spirit knows exactly what we need, even before we do!