Despite It All

She's up.
She's down.
She's both at the same time.

I'm finding myself on a crazy emotional roller coaster.  Strapped in, unable to get off.

So many changes going on around us.  So many moving or changing directions.  So many hurting.  So many growing up.  New lives beginning. Lives falling apart.  Those we care for blatantly turning their backs on their faith.  A world so lost.

Wondering and seeking in regards to our calling and purpose. Conviction to live differently and coming back to an even deeper, stronger faith.

It's just made me so out-of-sorts emotionally.

I feel like I'm walking around with a Kleenex or some kind of chocolate in hand at all times.

I'm physically exhausted.  It's just one of those seasons.

I'm emotionally drained.

Yet, I'm finding the greatest of all is that I'm spiritually thriving.

Today, I kept looking around and seeing things that I take for granted.

God has richly blessed.

Tonight, I'm feeling so undeserving and so thankful.

He has given me more than I could ever ask for.  Despite my failures.  Despite my weaknesses.  Despite my bad habits.  Despite my lack of faith and boldness at times. Despite it all.

He is pouring it out abundantly.

It may not be in riches.  It may not be in the ways the world says is wealth.

But...

My heart is full.  My cup is overflowing.

Even through emotional ups and down, struggles and concerns about issues that seem to be getting longer by the day....

He is constant. He is faithful.

It's a priceless feeling.

My eyes are opening to the gifts right in front of me....

and yes...

I need more Kleenex!