My Lighthouse

Spending this past weekend on a getaway with my husband was an absolute treasure.  There's nothing like temporarily letting go of everything else and giving 100% focus to the marriage relationship. It doesn't take long as parents to realize that there just isn't enough of you to go around ALL THE TIME, so stepping away and renewing, rekindling, refocusing, and rediscovering is VITAL.  We'll be the first to tell you that we didn't take advantage of those opportunities AT ALL for the first 10 plus years of our marriage and WE SUFFERED greatly for it.  (And yes, our house was still standing and the kids still breathing when we returned.  Our daughter keep everyone on track and alive!  Just a mountain of laundry to catch up on!).

At one point, we looked at each other and just smiled over the SIMPLICITY of it all.  It wasn't about the bells and whistles, it was just about each other. It didn't take a drop of alcohol, a movie or TV show with questionable values or immodesty, it didn't take spending lavishly or shopping with money we didn't have, it didn't take fancy meals (though our dinner at Clementine's was off the chart...but we were also content with our dollar menu from Wendy's!), etc...  It was just simply about us....just solely connected and focused.  That's when we realized:  we definitely have something special.  A friendship.  An intimate connection on countless levels.  A growing love of each other as we grow deeper in relationship with Christ.  Something to thank God for more every day.

I've always been obsessed with lighthouses.  Their beauty.  Their purpose.  Their setting. Their history. Just all things about them.

A couple of years ago, we took our first trip to see multiple ones and for me it was a DREAM come true.  Though I want to visit more and more, the trip was amazing to me.  We had planned to visit another section (coast of Wisconsin this time) as our family vacation that we had to cancel when life took some turns this summer.  Wanting to just revisit some of the closer ones, drew us back to Michigan this weekend for a short, economically friendly late anniversary trip.  It was FRIGID and a brutal reminder of the winter that is TOO rapidly approaching, but the sleet and windburn was well worth it.  We did get in a beautiful day before we left, even though it was still a bit on the chilly side and winds that could still pick you up and carry you away!

Last night, as I was looking through pictures and loving the memories that Kevin and I made together and feeding my love of lighthouses---a question popped in my spirit that hasn't let go.

"Who is guiding you?"

Over and over, situation after situation, seeped in my heart begging to ask me to look deeper.

A lighthouse has a distinct purpose.  It's to guide sailors safely to shore, specifically in storms.  The beacon of light is to highlight the way, while pointing out dangers.

Life is stormy.  Oh, is it ever.  Many times we can feel like we are being tossed at sea, not knowing if we will be able to survive the waves.  Some days we feel as if we are being crushed and broken.

But....

We have an anchor in the storm.
We have a guide.

We have a lighthouse.

But...

Are we following His lead? Are we seeing His light and looking the other way in disobedience? Are we seeing His light, but still refusing to let go of our own way of doing things?

I don't like the honest answer I'd have to give more times than a few.

Where am I looking for guidance?

Am I looking for Him above all things, FIRST, and whole-heartedly?
Am I listening to Him or am I caught up in listening to my own voice, my own fears, or to others instead of Him? (*ouch, ouch, OUCH!!!!!!!*)

Am I keeping my eyes on Him or am I too focused on the waves?

Again, some tough questions and some painful answers.

The kids and I are currently talking about TRUTH and how to discern what is true in our Biblical studies.  How easy it is to be misled, even by our own hearts and even by those that we trust.  There are those that purposely try to persuade us down wrong paths, but there is also those that are much more subtle.  The only TRUTH we can be sure of is GOD and HIS WORD.

It's the light.
He's the lighthouse.

He's our guide.

But are we seeking Him.  Anchored to Him.  Keeping our eyes fixed on nothing else?

Soaking in that message in my heart today and also listening to and really focusing on the lyrics from Rend Collective's "My Lighthouse".

"My Lighthouse"

In my wrestling and in my doubts
In my failures You won't walk out
Your great love will lead me through
You are the peace in my troubled sea
You are the peace in my troubled sea

In the silence, You won't let go
In my questions, Your truth will hold
Your great love will lead me through
You are the peace in my troubled sea
You are the peace in my troubled sea

My Lighthouse, my lighthouse
Shining in the darkness, I will follow You
My Lighthouse, my Lighthouse
I will trust the promise, 
You will carry me safe to shore 
Safe to shore 
Safe to shore

I won't fear what tomorrow brings
With each morning I'll rise and sing
My God's love will lead me through
You are the peace in my troubled sea
You are the peace in my troubled sea

Fire before us, You're the brightest
You will lead us through the storms