Holding On

Though the last several weeks have been quite stressful and hard physically and emotionally, they've been a time of awakening in my spirit. 

A time that has drawn me back to His word in a new way.
A time that has me spending more time in communication with him---both talking AND listening.
A time that has created some shifts in my heart. 

My eyes have been opened to more things He wants to change in me.
My eyes have been open to areas that I still haven't surrendered to Him.

I see areas that still leave me confused.  Full of doubts.  Places that I see where I have BIG areas of growth potential. 

As this month brings HUGE opportunities for spiritual growth and renewal between Hearts at Home National Conference (Christian motherhood) and Teach Them Diligently (Homeschool Convention specifically geared towards families who place an emphasis on Spiritual Training as a top priority) and continuing to be present with growth opportunities through being part of  "No More Perfect Kids" book launch team.....I find myself just wanting to stop....pause....absorb....shut out all of the noise of the world.  Yet, life is still going on at warp speed.  I'm purposely making decisions to have less noise----less distractions.  Clearing my head so that I can absorb all that I possibly can.   Getting deeper and deeper in His word---just one-on-one.  Praying for wisdom.  On my knees and face before Him. 

You see....

I LOVE the fun aspects of weekends like those ahead.  They renew.  They provide fellowship.  They bring countless moments of laughter. 

BUT...

They have such potential to bring about deep change.  Going in with the mindset of, "Lord, Speak to me.  Reveal more of you to me.", changes everything.  It causes me to just want to hide in a corner and just soak in every minute I have to grow at these events.  Away from distractions.  Just me and Him.  Just my husband and I  (at TTD) soaking in what God needs to reveal to us.

This mindset also brings about a battle.  Satan doesn't like it in the least.  He starts to bring out every weapon in his arsenal and my goodness has he ever been going non-stop.  Every morning and night, it seems like we have been hit with HUGE heavy weight issues over the last weeks.  They've definitely been moments of having to surrender to God because we cannot physically carry them on our own shoulders.  Sure, the daily battles of a vehicle breaking down on the side of the road and needing to be towed was greatly inconvenient and stressful....but the weapons he's thrown at us have just been like daggers to our spirit. 

Well, they've been intended to be that way.

But...

God has been faithful.  He's walking along side us and IN us.  Giving us the ability to focus our eyes on Him. 

Best of all, we KNOW that the best is just around the corner.  The daggers are attempts to distract and defeat, but instead they are drawing us TO HIM. 

Satan can back down now.  We know the end of the story.  We know who the victor is. 

Holding to the hand of the Potter.  The Master of the entire universe.  The One who knows the outcome.  The One who has our names engraved in the palm of His hand. 

Holding onto that hand.  That lifeline.  Not letting go.

So beyond ready for the days and week ahead.  Beyond ready.