"She's fighting back. She won't be taken down. Her God will prevail and do a good work in her."
Those are the words that are seeping into my heart today.
I may be battling, struggling, on rocky ground....
I do have way too many browser tabs open in my head/heart and am seeking to simplify my heart and mind. I am struggling to find balance with meeting more needs than I can meet on my own. I do have some muck and mire to wade through. I do have some areas that I need to surrender to God to allow Him to do His work.
However, I know one of my biggest issues is that I've lost some of my "fire" because I'm not seeking Him above all things. I have once again found myself focusing on situations and circumstances and I'm focusing on the storm, instead of the Master!
But when I come back to the simplicity and shut out the rest of everything...I find Him. Already just waiting on me. He's not that hard to find, I'm just guilty of looking everywhere else first.
I tend to have a bad habit of getting caught up in the opinions of others too much. Even though it matters FAR less as I get older, I do find myself caught up in it much too much. When I begin to let the opinions of others shape me, I quickly find myself in a pit. One that drags me deeper, quickly.
I tend to overthink. (Ha, really?) I tend to worry. (Gets me no where, like a rocking chair!). I try to control too many things. (Surely not!). I tend to look at the things going wrong instead of celebrating the victories much too often.
So, as I go back to the basics. Go back to the truths. Go back to the goodness He has always provided.
I find Him. Waiting on me.
Ready to provide peace. Restore brokenness. Speak to my heart. Correct in love.
Whether I'm too busy to be in His word or in a season of life that is really chaotic and hard to focus (raising children IS chaos no matter what ages and stages!), I can't let that be an excuse. Because, frankly, it is NOTHING but an excuse. A pretty lame one. Because in His word...
It's a choice.
To renew my heart. Renew my mind. Communicate. Drink from the fountain.
Yesterday, I got in His word. With the wrong attitude at first. Just the let's "get this done" and over type attitude....and I got nothing. Duh!!! Then I did a heart check and went back with a teachable heart and the words filled my heart. Over and over. Answers and encouragement I needed just flowed from the pages.
Today, I found myself quickly slipping into a mindset that I didn't want to get a grip on me because I had read something on facebook that irritated me and caused my mind to wander to places that I'm seeking for God to restore. I had to make a choice: get deeper in the negativity (even though I would choose not to confront this person or verbally say anything in response----it was still creating havoc in my own heart) or transform my thought process. Making a choice to step away and refocus.
THIS time, I made the right choice.
I recognized the trigger, replaced it with truth, and learned.
It truly is about the renewing of the heart and mind. Making choices that are healthy! What I read wasn't the problem. My reaction to it was the problem. What I allowed it to do in my heart and mind was the problem.
I constantly gravitate to words of scripture that remind me of the power of the mind and transforming it. You'll see those written in various places around our home. Mostly because I NEED the reminder. I NEED to make the right choices and refocus my heart, mind, and priorities.
Today, I put in a Seeds Family Worship CD---a fantastic tool that I originally bought for our children, but quickly found it shaping my own heart even more. I just told my daughter to grab one out of the stack and put it in because I needed to change the direction of my heart. She happened to choose the 3rd one "Praise". Immediately, my heart did change. Drowning out the frustration. Calming my heart.
I kid you not....
The CD got stuck on a song. On repeat. Over and over. Yes, it's probably just a scratch or finger print (I do have multiple kids that aren't the most gentle with things!), but I also believe that the Holy Spirit can open our hearts in different ways. He just happened to grab mine deeper with a song STUCK on repeat.
The verses just grabbed me and held me tight. So very needed! Clinging to them like never before.
(The Song is The Rock Eternal taken from Isaiah 26:3-4)
"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD himself, is the Rock eternal."
That is a POWERFUL passage. That is where my heart and mind need to focus. Peace comes from trusting Him. He is the anchor. He is the ROCK.
Look away from the situations.
Look away from the triggers that pull me away from Him.
Focus back on Him.
My mind will become steadfast (unwavering, immovable, firmly fixed, focused, faithful) when I TRUST in Him. In perfect peace. Contentment. A place of stability.
That is WHAT I need.
That is ALL I need.
Answers: waiting right in scripture!